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No More Silence: It’s Never Too Late to Start Healing
This video started with a conversation. Anthony Newcastle and I and our colleague Gordon Glenbar were discussing how to reach out and offer support to Aboriginal and Torres Strait Islander men who have...
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Fill in the Blank
Earlier this year, Parul Sehgal wrote an essay examining “compulsory survivorship”—the tendency to label everyone who has had an abusive or unwanted sexual experience as a survivor. This is usually...
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Forgiveness vs. Reconciliation
In my experience, one path to true happiness and freedom is forgiveness, which is why I love writing about it. I grew up hearing, “Randy you just have to forgive, forget and move on.” These words only...
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Supporting a New Frontier of Anti-Sexual Violence Work
I was pleased to join the work of 1in6.org as a new Board Member in June. In the three-plus decades that I have been involved in the anti-violence movement, I have witnessed the movement grow to reach...
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Following Your Bliss
One definition of bliss is to reach a state of perfect happiness, typically so as to be oblivious of everything else. Another explanation of bliss is that bliss is the pathway to happiness. Happiness...
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Mending Fences
Originally published on May 15, 2014I’ve always been intrigued by the different choices people make, while working to restore good boundaries in their life after an experience of abuse. Whether it’s...
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Self-Acceptance
One of the affects of my abuse that has followed me into my adult life until just recently is being accepted. Often, male survivors not only face an internal battle for self-acceptance, but an external...
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Three Lessons in the Meaning of Community
On Wednesday, October 5th, I flew over the beautiful, rugged landscape of western New Mexico, bound for Phoenix. I looked ahead to an intense four days in Arizona – three public events plus a clinical...
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Redefining Forgiveness
Many believe it is not necessary to forgive the person who hurt you, in order to heal. As part of my healing journey, I found that I had to redefine forgiveness for myself, because the self-righteous...
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A Closed Chapter
If you have been following me, you know that forgiveness is one of my favorite topics. It is also the one topic I struggled with most in my life. For most of my adult life, or at least until I entered...
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